the “beloved disciple” and author of this Gospel.1 Since he never names himself in this Gospel, that would make sense and fit the eyewitness touches in this scene. We will never know until we get to heaven. The double meaning continues in verse 38. Jesus turns and asks, “What do you want?” (literally “What are you seeking?”). Again there is far more meaning than appears on the surface. This will be asked again in 18:4, 7, and 20:15, and it always demands a thoughtful response regarding the deep desires